Yes, I’ve been crapped on by a bird before. It was in Jr. High school, where if you tripped over your Nike Cortez shoelaces, the kids would be laughing for months about it. So getting crapped on during lunch hour and returning to class with a green substance stained into your white peasant shirt blouse was mortifying. Right now, people in New York are “flocking” to get bird crap facials…remember the fish pedicure post I made a while back.. well this is probably just as bad.
The dried Nightingale bird crap is sanitized under a UV light, then mixed with rice bran to create some sort of super expensive and hyped up facial. Women are claiming that they are glowing like J. Lo after the treatment. ::sigh::
After I did some research, I found out that the bird crap contains a substance called guanine, which is basically the shimmery stuff you find in cosmetics and shampoos. Guanine is found in fish scales, and that is the source where most of those shimmery cosmetics get that from. So why not just get a fish scale facial instead?
My theory is that the guanine is slightly abrasive, so when it’s massaged into the skin, it’s sloughing off dead skin cells. It probably contains a little bit of acid, so that also could help with smoothing out the skin’s surface. I actually think that you could get the same results using an organic scrub with the finest granules of abrasive you can find. If I find anything, I’ll let you know.. but I am very loyal to Proactiv, so I may not go too far with my investigation.
What is your favorite facial scrub?